Arguing with a fool on the internet is like wrestling a pig; you both get dirty, and the pig likes it. A wise woman considers her child’s health and nutrition, but posting about it on Facebook is like poking a thousand bears. The prudent person recognizes a troll and mutes them, but the simple keep arguing and suffer needless stress. …
Psalm 23: The Reading Aloud Mom Version
This is how Psalm 23 goes when you’re reading to a 3 year old, a 1 year old, and a 3 month old: The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not want, If you get ketchup on my Bible I’ll be upset.
Excerpts From A Pregnancy Nature Documentary: Part I
*The following post is to be read in your best British nature documentary narrator voice.*
The Lorica of Saint Mommy of Sick Children
Yeah. So, we’ve had a stomach virus here for about the past week, and today it culminated in one of the most craptastic days in my three year career so far as a mother. Bad things have been happening. Bad, bad things.
50 Shades Of Grey, The Sequel
Yeah, yeah, yeah. The book already has two sequels; 50 Shades Darker and 50 Shades Freed. But as a writer, I feel a compulsive need to offer some creative suggestions for the second film should they decide to stray from the book plot. Or heck, maybe E. L. James will write a fourth book, and she can incorporate some of …
No. I Don’t Have Tourrette’s. I’m A Mother.
This morning, as I nursed my one-month-old, ate a bowl of cereal, and spoon-fed my toddler breakfast all at the same time, it occurred to me that if I blogged the way I talk then it would read something like this: Having two young daughters is a lot of – don’t touch that – that fun. My toddler turns two …